Chemo 1 of 4 is finished....

Yesterday I watched A Few Good Men (someone asked)  and today to Chemo I wore the black velour sweatsuit.  It was the right choice as I spent most the day laying in a hospital bed.  I tried not to.  I tried to sit in one of the chairs in the room when we got there because I don't want to be a patient.  But I am and so I laid in bed and got hooked to a bunch of different IV lines in my left hand.

The rooms are private.  Little 10 x 8 or 10 x 10 with a bed, comfortable chair or two and a flat screen on the wall for TV and DVD's.  Next time I will know to bring a movie.  Ken sat with me as we listened to 30 minutes of what to expect and what to do when/if it happens.

Then the fun begins.  As it started, I realized that I couldn't really imagine how this would go or how it would feel.  It is perhaps too big for my mind to have a handle on.  Here I was sitting in a room where they are pushing poison into you with intent to kill parts of you.   I was strong during most of the prep work.  Then a little scared as the first drugs caused rashes on my arms and itching.  I worried about an allergic reaction but the first 2 drugs (steroids, anti-nausea meds) went fine.

Then we got to the C of the T & C cocktail.  30 minute drip.  I experienced the one possible side effect that for the last 10 minutes I had a splitting headache and huge pressure in my sinuses.  But then we were done and it went away.  I had thought that perhaps I could have a nice time reading while this was all happening.  Another of the side effects was that my eyesight went in and out, perhaps because of the fluid making them swell?  I couldn't concentrate.  So there went that.  Mostly I just sat around.


Then on to the T.  They give this drug last I have decided because it is the worst.  The side effects were immediate.  My stomach clenched.  Over 10 minutes in I had a scary allergic reaction.  My face felt like I was on fire and went bright red.  More seriously I couldn't breathe and my throat and lungs were closing.  Pain swept across my back muscles.  Ken rang the nurse and three nurses were there in 12 seconds.  Within 60 seconds, they had pulled the drug from the IV and I had been pumped full of Benadryl.  They also injected more steroids.  Over the next five to ten minutes I recovered.   It was 5 minutes of panic in 6 hours of care.  (I'm trying to keep it in perspective for myself.) We waited 30 minutes for the drugs to kick in.  I asked for Ativan (anti-anxiety medication) as I was shaking inside terrified that I would have another allergic reaction.  1/2 dose worked to reduce the shakes.

I asked the nurse if anyone had ever been so allergic that they had been unable to complete the treatment? No.   "Do you keep just pumping them full of drugs until they can take it?"  Yes.  "Do you think it will happen again?"  No, I think we've given you enough.   I can't even think about what it says about how poisonous this stuff is.

The second round went fine. No allergic reaction.  As soon as it was done, I bolted.  I so wanted to get out of that place.  Nice people but...

So I am home.  Feeling weird-ed out by drugs again so this may or may not make sense.  The only two side effects I have so far are dry mouth and an upset stomach.  But over the next few days I will be on enough steroids that they will mask a bunch of symptoms.   I had thought the chemo day would be easy and the side effects difficult but here is hoping that the day is hard and the side effects don't happen.

Looking forward.